Many of you might be wondering about the name for this blog. One week prior to my memory of the childhood sexual abuse which began my journey up the mountain of healing from the lies buried in my heart I was journaling and asking God what He had to say to me that day. I was not prepared for His answer that day. I would like to share parts of that entry to explain why the title of this blog seemed a natural choice for my story.
"You have come a long way from the scared little girl from Kansas with no plan, hope or future. It hasn't always been an easy walk for you. You hold onto "things" very tightly. You are very self-reliant and stubborn. You are smart and logical. None of these things is bad when used for Me but they are hard obstacles for you to climb over, lay down, when you don't release them and try to get to Me with all this stuff in your way. Many of my children need to grow up, step up, accept responsibility. You, my child, need to learn to lay it down, relax, rest, enjoy life. I know you can do things for Me and will do them well but will you enjoy Me, our walk together? Will your face reflect joy, peace, overflowing, abundant love? Will you smile and laugh? Dance with Me? You are so willing to go - build houses, churches in hot dirty places, feed My chilren who need a place to feel loved, allow My treasures - the broken, dirty ones into your life and your home - but do you enjoy Me? I want to share fun with you - I didn't make you as a beast of burden. You are not a plow horse, oxen or camel. You are My delight - a beautiful woman inside and out - with a soft heart, willing hands but you don't share it. I see you take on the cares of the world, head down in shame and failure, knees buckled, arms hanging dowm, dejected. It breaks my heart to see you that way. I don't want that for you. I created you to dance with Me, dance through your life, over life, in other's lives. I created you to be filled with joy and peace - it is My gift to you - take it. Let me have your cares and worries, you can't fix them only I can. I want your walk to be an adventure. Take off your work boots, put on your dancing shoes. The world won't stop turning because you had fun, smiled, rested, relaxed, enjoyed your life. Trust Me. I will tell you when to put on your work boot - until then let's dance."
"Stop, lay it all down and dance with Me. Let Me hold you close, feel My arms around you, let Me lead - you follow. Close your eyes, feel the music, it is My music - my speed, my sounds and just dance. The greatest gift you can give Me is your smile - to see you so full of joy, so confident in Me and who you are in Me that all I can see is your smile. Dance with Me. Smile for Me."
It was at this time that God began calling me His dancing princess.
Within a week, after crying out to God and asking Him to show me what was keeping me from dancing with Him, He revealed the truth of my past and has been taking me on a journey to beome the woman He created me to be and not the woman the world created me to be. I am truly beoming His dancing princess. I believe God wants that for all His children, not just me.
Do you enjoy God? Will you dance with Him?
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